Narcissistic Behavior Tactics
It’s Not Random. It’s a Pattern.
Narcissists don’t operate on chaos — they operate on patterns.
If it feels like you’ve been through the same fight 50 times with different people, you probably have.
It’s not you. It’s a tactic.
Narcissistic behavior isn’t just “bad behavior.” It’s strategic behavior — designed to manipulate, distract, destabilize, and dominate. And once you can name the game, you stop playing it on defense.
This page breaks down the exact behaviors narcissists use to maintain control — and how survivors can identify, minimize, and ultimately break free from their grip.
What Makes a Behavior “Narcissistic”?
“Narcissistic” doesn’t just mean arrogant or self-absorbed. In this context, it means:
🎯 Lacks empathy
🎯 Seeks to dominate or control
🎯 Destroys your sense of clarity and self
🎯 Uses emotional manipulation as a weapon
The narcissist’s goal is simple: win the power dynamic. Whether through charm, cruelty, or confusion, they will use whatever tactic works best to stay in control.
🛠️ The 10 Core Narcissistic Behavior Tactics
💣 1. Gaslighting
“You’re crazy.”
“That never happened.”
“You’re too sensitive.”
Gaslighting makes you question your memory, instincts, and sanity. You stop trusting yourself — and start trusting them. That’s the point.
🎭 2. Love Bombing
“You’re the only person who ever understood me.”
“Let’s move in together.”
Love bombing is affection on steroids — not because they love you, but because they want access to you. It’s the bait, not the bond.
🧊 3. Silent Treatment / Stonewalling
They disappear or go cold to punish you. It’s not a “cooling-off period” — it’s emotional exile used to regain control without lifting a finger.
🌀 4. Word Salad
Circular logic. Tangents. Nonsense arguments. You walk away confused, exhausted, and apologizing — even if you didn’t do anything wrong.
🪞 5. Projection
They call you manipulative.
They accuse you of cheating.
They flip every flaw back at you — because their ego can’t tolerate ownership.
🧃 6. Supply Extraction
They feed on attention, loyalty, admiration, or control — but rarely give anything in return. You’re either fueling them, or being punished.
🧍 7. Triangulation
They compare you to others, bring third parties into private matters, or turn people against you — all to keep you off-balance and chasing approval.
🎲 8. Hot-and-Cold Tactics
Affection, then rejection. Support, then sabotage. These swings keep you addicted to hope while tolerating emotional harm.
🧨 9. Reactive Abuse
They provoke you until you explode — then use your reaction to brand you as unstable. It’s entrapment, not evidence.
🧱 10. Boundary Testing
You say no, they push again. You say stop, they pretend not to hear. Testing boundaries is how they find your limits — and break them.
Why You Keep Falling for the Tactics
These tactics work because they’re:
🎯 Subtle at first
🎯 Wrapped in affection or concern
🎯 Timed during your most vulnerable moments
🎯 Reinforced with guilt, charm, or blame
If you didn’t see it coming, that’s by design.
🧭 From Confusion to Clarity
When you name the tactic, you break the trance.
Gaslighting becomes: “This is reality manipulation.”
Triangulation becomes: “This is a control tactic.”
Love bombing becomes: “This is excessive to get me hooked.”
The power shifts. Slowly. Then all at once.
🛡️ Reclaim Your Agency
You are not too sensitive.
You are not dramatic.
You are not imagining things.
You are responding to a system of control that was designed to make you feel unbalanced and unworthy.
But you’re learning.
You’re seeing it.
And you’re walking out.
💬 Final Word
These behaviors aren’t random.
They’re rehearsed.
They’re refined.
And they’re repeated.
But once you see the pattern, you stop falling for it.
And the moment you stop dancing to the narcissist’s rhythm, you take your power back.
