Ever Had a Conversation That Left You More Confused Than Before? That’s Word Salad.
You ask a simple question.
They give a long-winded, rambling, disconnected response.
💥 They talk in circles.
💥 They throw in unrelated topics.
💥 They twist your words, deny what they just said, or act like you’re the problem.
And when you try to get a straight answer?
💥 They accuse YOU of being difficult.
Maybe you’ve heard:
❌ “You always do this—you bring up things that don’t matter.”
❌ “I can’t believe you’re making such a big deal out of nothing.”
❌ “You’re too emotional right now; let’s talk when you’re thinking clearly.”
❌ “What do you mean? That’s not even what we were talking about.”
❌ “You’re twisting my words.”
At first, you try harder to clarify what you’re asking.
Then, you get frustrated, realizing they’re deliberately avoiding the point.
And before you know it, the conversation has gone in so many directions that you forgot what you were even arguing about.
That’s word salad—a narcissistic manipulation tactic where they use vague, nonsensical, and circular speech to avoid accountability, confuse you, and make you question your own sanity.
If you’ve ever felt like someone in your life is impossible to have a real conversation with because they constantly derail, twist, and avoid giving direct answers, you’ve been targeted by one of the most maddening power plays in narcissism.
Let’s break down why they do it, how it affects you, and how to shut it down using the IMC Method™.
What Is Word Salad? (And Why Narcissists Use It)
Word salad is not just bad communication—it’s deliberate confusion. It’s used to:
✅ Distract from the real issue.
✅ Make you feel exhausted and overwhelmed.
✅ Avoid answering direct questions.
It works because most people expect conversations to be productive. The narcissist exploits this by turning every discussion into a frustrating maze, making you feel like the problem.
🔥 Word salad isn’t about discussion—it’s about deflection. 🔥
How Word Salad Works (And Why It’s So Toxic)
Narcissists use tangents, contradictions, and gaslighting to make sure you never get a straight answer.
Word Salad in Action: The Narcissist’s Playbook
🔹 Rambling & Going Off on Tangents – They start talking about unrelated topics to derail the conversation.
🔹 Changing the Subject – You ask about one thing, and they suddenly bring up something completely different.
🔹 Twisting Your Words – They misinterpret what you said so they can argue against something you never actually meant.
🔹 Playing the Victim – Instead of answering, they act like you’re attacking them just for asking.
🔹 Blame Shifting – If you confront them, they turn it around on you—suddenly, YOU’RE the problem.
🔹 Flat-Out Denial – Even if you catch them in a lie, they insist they never said or did that.
🚨 Then, the shift happens. 🚨
🔹 You start doubting your ability to communicate.
🔹 You get so emotionally drained that you stop trying to argue.
🔹 You feel like YOU’RE the one who’s unreasonable.
🔹 You walk away feeling confused instead of getting the answers you need.
Over time, this makes you:
⚠️ Less confident in your ability to express yourself.
⚠️ More anxious about bringing up issues.
⚠️ Easier to control, since you stop trying to have real discussions.
And THAT is the goal—to make conversations so exhausting that you stop questioning them altogether.
🔥 Word salad isn’t confusion—it’s manipulation. 🔥
How to Respond to Word Salad (IMC Method™)
You don’t try to clarify, debate, or “fix” the conversation. Why? Because word salad only works if you keep engaging.
Instead, you use the IMC Method™ (Identify, Minimize, Control) to see through their game, refuse to engage, and take back your peace.
1. IDENTIFY: Recognize When They’re Using Word Salad
The first step is realizing that they’re NOT confused—they’re avoiding the issue.
✅ Ask yourself: Am I actually getting an answer, or are they just deflecting?
✅ Notice the pattern. Do they do this every time they’re confronted?
✅ Trust your instincts. If the conversation makes no sense, that’s because it’s designed that way.
💡 Example: If they say, “You’re making a big deal out of nothing, and I don’t have time for this,” instead of explaining why it IS important, respond with:
✔️ “I asked a simple question. If you can’t answer it, we’re done talking.”
🔥 Why It Works: You stop chasing a conversation that was never meant to be real.
2. MINIMIZE: Stop Playing Their Game
Word salad only works if you keep trying to get an answer.
✅ Don’t get dragged into their tangents—redirect the conversation.
✅ Refuse to let them pull you into emotional exhaustion.
✅ Walk away if the discussion is going nowhere.
💡 Example: If they change the subject to avoid your question, instead of trying to steer it back, respond with:
✔️ “That’s not what I asked. If you won’t answer, I won’t waste my time.”
🔥 Why It Works: You make it clear that you won’t participate in their nonsense.
3. CONTROL: Set Boundaries & End the Conversation
Narcissists use word salad to make you feel powerless—so you take control by refusing to engage.
✅ Limit your conversations with them whenever possible.
✅ Don’t allow them to waste your energy.
✅ Make it clear that you will NOT entertain nonsense.
💡 Example: If they continue rambling and deflecting, instead of arguing, respond with:
✔️ “This isn’t a conversation—it’s a waste of time. Let me know when you’re ready to be honest.”
🔥 Why It Works: You set a boundary that their deflection won’t work on you.
What Happens When You Stop Playing Their Game?
When you stop chasing logical conversations with an illogical person, the narcissist loses one of their favorite control tactics.
They might:
⚠️ Get angry that you’re refusing to engage.
⚠️ Try to bait you back in with more nonsense.
⚠️ Turn it around on you, claiming you’re the one being unreasonable.
🚨 Stay strong. Their reaction is proof that they rely on word salad to maintain control.
The more you hold your ground and refuse to engage in their mental gymnastics, the weaker their influence becomes.
Conversations Should Make Sense—Not Exhaust You
Word salad is designed to keep you confused and emotionally drained—but you don’t have to accept it.
✔️ You don’t have to stay in conversations that make no sense.
✔️ You don’t have to prove yourself to someone who keeps moving the goalposts.
✔️ You don’t have to waste your time trying to get an honest discussion out of a dishonest person.
Real conversations have clarity. If someone is constantly twisting words, they aren’t confused—they’re controlling.
🔹 For full IMC Method™ strategies and free tools, visit our linked blog series. Tired of the Narcissistic Mind Games? Get the Tools to Break Free.